(Good disclaimer.) Yeah, I think you're right about that; people try to explain the differences in the way other people describe themselves or identify in the context of reducible differences in biophysical phenotype, and that gets.... complicated?
For example, for me, gender falls along that pathway: I think I could reasonably identify as either nonbinary or the way I do, which is gender-non-conforming-butch, and the reason I have chosen to identify the way I do is contextual in and of itself: I am most comfortable identifying my gender tradition under a broader umbrella of female under which it has historically been... associated, often, even while it slides out of that tradition and is overlooked and ignored. Someone else might decide they are more comfortable underscoring the disconnect between butch and female, or thinking of female as a more specific gender tradition than I do. (I think of it as a looser collection of a whole bunch of often-unnamed gender traditions influenced by class and culture, with a hegemonic understanding of "female" controlled by dominant races, classes, and cultures. But that hegemonic understanding doesn't encompass all the traditions that sit unacknowledged in that country, you feel me?)
But all that shit aside, I can envision equally well a scenario in which I would prefer to identify as nonbinary, pick up a more focused and discrete understanding of what "female" means that doesn't include my own experiences and identified-tradition of gender, and feel most comfortable requesting alternate pronouns that would underscore that disconnect. (As it is, I squirm when my disconnect isn't acknowledged and squirm when people don't acknowledge my connection in equal measures.)
Fuck, it's complicated. I don't choose to be comfortable or not be comfortable, I don't choose what lets me experience comfort and what makes me itch and my skin crawl, but the framework I use to cue people into the type of experiences that are most relevant to mine changes based on my cultural context. It's communication all the way down.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-03-06 06:22 pm (UTC)For example, for me, gender falls along that pathway: I think I could reasonably identify as either nonbinary or the way I do, which is gender-non-conforming-butch, and the reason I have chosen to identify the way I do is contextual in and of itself: I am most comfortable identifying my gender tradition under a broader umbrella of female under which it has historically been... associated, often, even while it slides out of that tradition and is overlooked and ignored. Someone else might decide they are more comfortable underscoring the disconnect between butch and female, or thinking of female as a more specific gender tradition than I do. (I think of it as a looser collection of a whole bunch of often-unnamed gender traditions influenced by class and culture, with a hegemonic understanding of "female" controlled by dominant races, classes, and cultures. But that hegemonic understanding doesn't encompass all the traditions that sit unacknowledged in that country, you feel me?)
But all that shit aside, I can envision equally well a scenario in which I would prefer to identify as nonbinary, pick up a more focused and discrete understanding of what "female" means that doesn't include my own experiences and identified-tradition of gender, and feel most comfortable requesting alternate pronouns that would underscore that disconnect. (As it is, I squirm when my disconnect isn't acknowledged and squirm when people don't acknowledge my connection in equal measures.)
Fuck, it's complicated. I don't choose to be comfortable or not be comfortable, I don't choose what lets me experience comfort and what makes me itch and my skin crawl, but the framework I use to cue people into the type of experiences that are most relevant to mine changes based on my cultural context. It's communication all the way down.