I have reached the phase of PhD hell...

...where I wish to drive to a cliff, launch myself off of it, and hopefully hit and kill some rodents on the way down.

Everything is chapter two. Chapter two was due two days ago. Is chapter two being sent to my committee? Noooooo. Is it ever going to be Good Enough? NOOOOOO. Am I trying to write two manuscripts from basically raw, unanalyzed data in six weeks? Yesssss.

god help me, I promised I'd broadcast this defense so people could watch if they wanted* but I am despairingly certain it's going to be shit and everything is shit forever and I just want to lie here and die. Instead the Manuscript beckons.

Then I have two weeks to do it again with chapter three. *high-pitched giggling* while around me, the world burns.

_{*look, there's got to be some benefit of dealing with Zoom defenses, right?}