Entry tags:
thinkin' about cort and stress and chronic stress
I'm setting up my committee meeting arguments this weekend, which involve a plan to basically take my previous work (leptin injections in singing mice: increase singing behavior, possibly not song quality??? and also it turns out there's a big social order effect) and replicate it in a more sensitive and sophisticated way.
( stuff specific to my work under the cut )
One of the most important things about this presentation to my committee is going to be the choices I make about what we measure that blood plasma for, why I argue we should measure them, and what I expect to find. So I need to nail that down soon and get this presentation sanded down and ready for Wednesday. Trouble is, I'm still thinking.
( here's where the cort and stress stuff comes in )
Also, probably relatedly: I am not sleeping for more than five hours or so at a time, and it is not getting better, and I am really fucking tired of falling asleep over my work, dammit. I had a rough meeting with my boss on Wednesday in which he basically gave me a hard time limit on graduating, and I need to turn on the skill, and I'm still broken but I've held it together this far on sheer cussedness and I'm not going to stop now. I want to look at this fucking thing. I want to look at fat and trauma and this weird little peptide that is doing way more than it gets credit for, and I have enough cussedness to see this damn thing through.
I did get in to see a new therapist, one with trauma training, yesterday for intake, on the theory that maybe change will help. I just about had left this post finished at that when my house started flooding, again, and I've just spent the last hour or so frantically bailing out the hallway and trying to make some kind of barrier against the rain. Thank fuck we have a Hoover mechanical mop... thing; we combined that with the Little Green, made a barrier of towels, and then K and I bailed like motherfuckers and T heroically ran into the side yard and set up emergency flood barriers. Thank fuck they're a paranoid genius and we had them on hand.
And my PI told me I needed to graduate by the spring or it wouldn't happen on Wednesday, and this meeting is... this Wednesday.
*hollow laughter* It never rains but it pours, huh?
( stuff specific to my work under the cut )
One of the most important things about this presentation to my committee is going to be the choices I make about what we measure that blood plasma for, why I argue we should measure them, and what I expect to find. So I need to nail that down soon and get this presentation sanded down and ready for Wednesday. Trouble is, I'm still thinking.
( here's where the cort and stress stuff comes in )
Also, probably relatedly: I am not sleeping for more than five hours or so at a time, and it is not getting better, and I am really fucking tired of falling asleep over my work, dammit. I had a rough meeting with my boss on Wednesday in which he basically gave me a hard time limit on graduating, and I need to turn on the skill, and I'm still broken but I've held it together this far on sheer cussedness and I'm not going to stop now. I want to look at this fucking thing. I want to look at fat and trauma and this weird little peptide that is doing way more than it gets credit for, and I have enough cussedness to see this damn thing through.
I did get in to see a new therapist, one with trauma training, yesterday for intake, on the theory that maybe change will help. I just about had left this post finished at that when my house started flooding, again, and I've just spent the last hour or so frantically bailing out the hallway and trying to make some kind of barrier against the rain. Thank fuck we have a Hoover mechanical mop... thing; we combined that with the Little Green, made a barrier of towels, and then K and I bailed like motherfuckers and T heroically ran into the side yard and set up emergency flood barriers. Thank fuck they're a paranoid genius and we had them on hand.
And my PI told me I needed to graduate by the spring or it wouldn't happen on Wednesday, and this meeting is... this Wednesday.
*hollow laughter* It never rains but it pours, huh?