sciatrix: (Default)
[personal profile] sciatrix
And, uh, am sorry for not responding to comments in the last post--life has gotten away from me again and I am not good with communication when I'm stressed. Thanks to everyone who sent me comforting comments, though!

Have spent a lot of time on self-care these last few days doing things that are low-stress, trying to make myself avoid tumblr, going out to eat with friends and attempting to indoctrinate my baby sister with more geekery, that sort of thing.

I was debating writing a birthday post for Writing From Factor X, since I created the blog as a birthday present to myself last year, but I just don't have the energy to write anything right now. I feel a little bit bad about that, because it's not that I don't have things to say, but more that I just don't have the time and the energy to sit down and write out something polished and acceptable to me and, you know, self care.

(Offhand, the topics currently lurking in the back of my head are: the limits of anger in activism and the point at which you write someone off, the ways in which we are arguably reclaiming 'asexual' for ourselves from the very pejorative way it is often used to apply to people, something cogent about how isolating invisibility can be, oversimplification of concepts when doing visibility and how we can avoid that, and that godawful post about the brain worms that being aromantic/wtfromantic/whatever the hell my affectional orientation is left me with, the one that's written almost entirely up but that I'm still hesitant to post. I am not exactly hurting for topics! Just... time. Would be quite willing to have conversations about any of those, though.)

Also, I have photos of my birthday cake! (Birthday cupcakes? Birthday EXTRAVAGANZA?) We did finish making it, about five people attempted to eat it, and I am currently trying to get my lab to eat most of the rest with limited success. Next time I do something big like this, I'm going to make sure I have more mouths. Anyway, photos!

Ta-da! The flavors shake out like this:
Metals are frosted in yellow and lemon-flavored.
Nonmetals are frosted in as-close-as-we-could-get-to-red and are red velvet.
Metalloids are frosted in pink and are strawberry.
Rare earth metals are white-frosted yellow cake.
Transition metals are purple-frosted devil's food cake.
Anything radioactive is green-frosted creme de menthe, because how else do you show radioactivity?

Date: 2011-09-20 03:44 am (UTC)
shiyiya: Shiyiya, a very pale white girl with brown hair and eyes. (Default)
From: [personal profile] shiyiya
You could freeze the leftovers and have instant cupcake whenever you felt like one?

That is pretty epic.

Date: 2011-09-20 09:47 am (UTC)
kaz: "Kaz" written in cursive with a white quill that is dissolving into (badly drawn in Photoshop) butterflies. (Default)
From: [personal profile] kaz
This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. :D

query: what's with the light vs dark yellow (Al vs Ga, for instance)? Are those both lemon-flavoured.

(and *hugs* @ feeling better!)

Date: 2011-09-20 04:11 pm (UTC)
aceeccentric: Angel wing with quote "just enough of a bastard to be worth liking" (Default)
From: [personal profile] aceeccentric
I hadn't thought before about how people are reclaiming 'asexual.' That is a very interesting way to think about it, hmm.

And ahhh that is the coolest thing :D I second possibly freezing the leftovers if you find room.

Date: 2011-09-20 11:46 pm (UTC)
aceeccentric: Angel wing with quote "just enough of a bastard to be worth liking" (Default)
From: [personal profile] aceeccentric
I really hadn't thought of it that way. Though I have noticed it. There's been more than one time when I've looked up guides to writing particular types of characters, or advice on writing particular types of characters, and been told flat-out that making these characters asexual was terrible. And, I knew what they meant -- they meant desexualizing people as part of a pattern, but it still hurt. It actually stopped me from writing a few narratives it got me so discouraged (even though I was not planning on making those particular characters asexual). In my own writing, when I've failed to remember to attempt to insert overt sexual interest where it was expected, people have asked me why the character seemed "child-like."

I knew people used sexy as awesome but I hadn't noticed the pattern of people using asexual as something terrible, which... yeah, that's awfully discouraging. I did see some of that in the asexual tag on Tumblr (which I still had the fortitude to actually track tags on Tumblr) but mostly the things there, besides outright anti-ace stuff, were "I wish I was asexual because I believe life is easier for them."

It sucks that people have used asexual that way with you around, that's terrible. And even though I'm stereotypical in that way as far as gender goes, I still don't understand how people conflate gender and sexuality -- but I guess that's where the "manly lesbian" and "effeminate gay man" stereotypes come from as well.

Oh, no. I have heard a lot of rhetoric about staying celibate, abstinence before marriage, etc., but I've never once heard the word asexual either. Oh, except from the occasional person who wanders in talking about how amazing asexual people for resisting their urges and how pure and righteous we must be (which I think you've written about before as well).

It actually might make me feel a little better in the future when I encounter people using the word as substitute for "bad" or "ugly" to think of how we're reclaiming it from that use.

Date: 2011-09-22 02:12 am (UTC)
aceeccentric: Angel wing with quote "just enough of a bastard to be worth liking" (Default)
From: [personal profile] aceeccentric
Ahh, of course. Because it's possible for our sexual orientation to be an insult, but not other people's... mmm, right. It is harder to argue against it when people use it like that.

They are extremely creepy people. And I hate people assuming what beliefs I ascribe to. It happens a lot when I tell non-Southern people I'm from the South, in particular. But there's also a lot of that when I see people telling others they're asexual... a lot of people assume it's a value judgment. It's somehow a lot creepier when they're praising you for it though.

It does. "How far we still have to go" seems ... like a road we'll never see the end of. "Progress we are making" at least lets us look behind us to see what we've done so far.

Date: 2011-09-20 07:16 pm (UTC)
nami_roland: (Default)
From: [personal profile] nami_roland
Yay for being in a better place! And those cupcakes are truly things of beauty.

Also, definitely up for ace conversations whenever. ~grins~

Date: 2011-09-22 02:09 am (UTC)
aceofhearts61: (Default)
From: [personal profile] aceofhearts61
Those cupcakes are amazing!

Glad you're feeling better. I've missed your posts recently.


Date: 2011-09-24 09:33 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] greenchestnuts
Those are epic, awesome cupcakes. I should do that for my sister for her next birthday. She would love it.

Belated happy birthday, and I am glad you are doing better!


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